I saw a news story recently about a Hindu guru named Mata Amritanandamayi. She’s gaining a considerable following worldwide, even filling enormous stadiums with travelers who’ve come to see her. Her theological schtick is fairly simple, she chants to the Hindu deity Krishna and people sit in front of her chanting to whatever God they choose. She’s referred to as Amma by her followers, which means mother, and she has a motherly aspect, a kind smile, kind eyes and a soft voice.
She does not make theological stands, and she does not offer advice that helps people succeed in their families or businesses, at least not with that specific intent. Her message is the same wish wash of a thousand other gurus before her. So why does she have such a following? And why is her following growing? The reason may surprise you.
Amma is gaining an enormous following because she gives hugs. Seriously, she’s the hugging guru. Her handlers estimate she has given more than thirty-million hugs. And these hugs are not unlike blessings, in which people receive a kind of enlightenment about the importance of loving one another.
Now to the critical Christian mind, this sounds like hogwash and we are tempted to roll our eyes. But the sad truth is people are not drawn to Amma because of her theological soundness, or her ability to give them right direction in life, or even to know their own purpose, people are drawn to her because God has hardwired them to be loved, and she’s willing to give them a hug.
I want to make a little hypothetical wager here. I bet that somebody with unsound doctrine will gain a greater following if they are loving than somebody with sound doctrine who is unloving, bitter or angry. Now the reverse is also true, that if somebody has sound doctrine AND love, they will attract more people, too. But the point is, people go to where they are loved, and are repelled from that system that does not create love.
The word love, or a derivative of that word, is used in scripture more than 550 times, including it’s use as a descriptor of God Himself. Love is at the core of human desire. We were wired to be loved by God, and tragically separated from Him, and we are pining for love in all it’s forms. People are led astray by what they think of as love all the time, and when true doctrine is spoken without love, people find Jesus repellent, which is why Satan loves for us to speak the truth without love more than he wants us to speak lies.
We are told people will know we are followers of Christ if we love one another, we are told that if we speak without love we are like clanging symbols, and yet we are not known by our love.
If you are a church leader, may I suggest a church growth plan? Center your mission on the love or God. Center your teaching on the aim of becoming more loving people. Center your outreach on genuinely loving people. Define the antagonists to your mission as the forces that rip apart your love, even if those forces are Christians who speak the truth, but do not love their neighbors or their enemies. These people are demonic. As theologically wish-washy as it all sounds, love is the core manifestation of our relationship with Christ. People will go to love, and when we stop loving people, we stop representing Christ.
I agree in almost every way except one little part of the sentence.
“Define the antagonists to your mission as the forces that rip apart your love, even if those forces are Christians who speak the truth, but do not love their neighbors or their enemies. These people are demonic.”
I would not call an actual believer in Christ “demonic” themselves. Severely twisted, (however that happened through woundedness or temptation..), and the weakness used, and exploited by the devil’s schemes, yes. As forces of destruction, used by the evil one, yes they could maybe called demonic. But, IF the soul is owned by Christ, even if the person is messed up, I couldn’t call the person “demonic”.
I’m thinkin’ down your way too.
I’m with you, too, and I think it can be really destructive to say it about people when there’s no evidence that it’s true.
I think a person who calls themselves a christian and doesn’t love isn’t actually a Christian – they’re fooling themselves. It’s a form of deceipt…a lie…who’s the Father of Lies? Satan. So who’s that person listening to?? Couldn’t be a Loving heavenly father or they’d be a loving person.
People (Christians) can be messed up but they can still be loving.
If a man says he loves God and hates his neighbor, he is a liar… 1 John 4:20
But I would agree with others and stop short of saying “those people are demonic,” because we are all incapable of loving in the Agape way that God loves. We all fall short. But our imperfect love is made perfect in Christ. It is only the presence of the Holy Spirit in us that can manifest the true love for our neighbors.
I would question if one can truely be “owned by Christ” if their life doesn’t reflect love..that is what I Corinthians 13 is talking about when it refers to “…resounding gong or a clanging cymbal”
So, I’m hearing the message is not to judge, but isn’t that exactly what you are doing when you claim that someone else is not loving, or demonic?
“He who does not love does not know God.”
Not here to debate, just to share that I’m encouraged by the thoughts you share, so thanks for sharing them!
I am a new Nurse and I was drawn to the profession because I love helping people and genuinely care about their well-being. When a new patient comes in, I know nothing about them. I don’t know the mistakes they’ve made, the people they’ve hurt, or what they believe in. I am called to help them in a caring manner. It requires patience and a caring heart. At the end of the day, by me caring for them, I am loving them. I take this thought of mind out of the hospital walls and when I see somebody I don’t know I just think to myself that if they were to be a patient of mine, I would be called to love them. It is not easy to put your judgements aside and look at somebody with an open mind. When prisoners arrive, I know they have committed some crime against society, but I have to love them anyway. No matter their flaws, God is still able to love them and so should I. Each and every person is a beautiful soul created by a God who does not make mistakes. If God loves them, then I have no reason not to.
Until I stop judging, loving people will be impossible. Seems to me the ‘hugging guru’ gives hugs without judgement, which is the other thing that draws people…
This was an awesome post to read and something that has also been resonating in my heart for quite some time.
Currently I’m preparing to move out west to help plant a church in Olympia, Washington, part of a church planting project called Surround the Sound. One thing that I know HAS to be true of leaders in our church is that we show love because that IS what people need. you’re totally right.
I come from a very conservative and rather small town in West Virginia where a lot of believers get caught up in judging others outside of the body of Christ rather than loving them like Christ. I spoke at a church and told them that I would love nothing more than to love the brokenhearted, the defeated and that I was extremely excited to love and befriend nonbelievers. Meet them and love them in their world, where they’re at, instead of trying to drag them into my world and tell them how they should really be living.
One person said to me “love isn’t all the world needs, you just have a hippie outlook on life” and I was like “Well, John 3:16, for God so loved the world that he gave his only son. love is what spurred God on to save our lives, so it definitely means something.”
great post Don.
You are right it is love that draws people to God, both us reflecting God’s love to people around us and people having a direct encounter with God and his love.
The simplicity of a hug.
I think that within a caste system this is extremely amazing.
I fear though that because of our own self-sufficient lifestyles, we do not always recognize our need for a hug every now and then especially when we wear the mask of “I’ve got everything under control”.
Is our need greater than the task of holding the mask in place?
God is love.
http://www.oneheartoneflesh.com/2010/02/03/tangled-web/
Hey Don, interesting post. Your comments on Mata’s offering of hugs prompted another question.
Ever hear of Nick Vujicic? He’s a guy with no arms and no legs who is also known for offering hugs after his speaking engagements. If you can get passed their theological differences they sit in the same boat. He’s a guy that speaks the truth in love and offers hugs at the same time. I’m curios what you (or your other readers) think about him or the contrast between him and Mata
So true and beautifully stated! I would love for it to be said of me that I have ‘kind eyes’ and ‘kind smile’. Imagine if that were the way that people recognized Christians…wouldn’t that be great?!
THIS is why I love your blog!
SO true, Don! I left the church that I’d been working at right out of Bible College because there was no love.. there was pressure to bring in new people, and pressure to conform… and pressure to prove their doctrine right, but no freedom to love. It’s also why I left the next church after that. I hadn’t been working there, because I’d washed my hands of being the “hands and feet” of a corrupt church model, but I was attending, and when my brother came out as gay and the youth group disowned him, I set out searching for somewhere that was a family of Christ-followers. I haven’t found it yet.. but I haven’t given up! I know there are people who love.
Keep looking, we are out there. There is nothing you can do to make God stop loving you and giving you the chance to love others. blessings on your journey.
Which is (yet another) reason why churchgoers are dropping like flies. People are looking for the relational, the personal, and for a loving experience.
I’d much rather have a hug than a sermon. And I don’t even like hugs.
I’d agree that church work without love is pointless. I’d agree that being a Christian without loving others is also pointless.
In a career driven and success oriented society it is difficult for those of us who are achievers to remember that caring about people is really and often the best use of my time.
So, to stir the waters here, if you have the hugging Guru and a grumpy hard-working Christian guy who never looks up from his reports in his cubicle–in the end, which life will be better in Jesus’ eyes? Is this like the parable of the talents somehow?
I think the parable of the talents is essentially about what we do with the gifts God gives us. Our divine skills-base, as it were. You may have heard that in Greco-Roman times, the word “talent” meant a large sum of money, but our own present-day usage of the word is equally fitting to the meaning of the parable.
However, in Biblical terms, love is not a gift, or a talent. Love is fruit (Galatians 5:22). Love is not something given to each of us which we may or may not make use of, as in your example of the hugging guru and the grumpy office worker. Rather, love (along with peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control) is the result of living by the Spirit. That’s why Paul warns us that the greatest gifts in the world amount to nothing if we have not love (1 Cor 13: 1-3), i.e., if we are not living by the Spirit.
To further complicate matters, the answer to your question about which of those two lives would be better in Jesus’ eyes cannot actually be determined from the information you give here. For no one but God can know every last detail of the soul of another person. Certainly, the persistent grumpiness of the Christian office-worker does suggest he is not living by the Spirit, whose fruit includes patience, gentleness, and self-control. But if the hugging guru does not acknowledge Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, then her outwardly Christ-like behavior is in service to an idol.
It’s good, of course, that we can’t know which person earns more favor in Jesus’ eyes. Because if we could know that, we would slip into works-righteousness. Our hugs would become calculated manoeuvres to earn divine favor, rather than spontaneous displays of love and affection.
Plus, Jesus has already told us whose life is better in his eyes (John 3:16).
Peter,
Thanks for the research. It isn’t exactly what I was after here though. Worded badly, yes, but it is more about thinking about our lives and motivations.
I don’t think it’s my job to do any sort of judging about what her life means to this world (only Jesus should) but I can love and identify with what is good and true about her life. Conversely, shouldn’t I encourage grumpy guy to invest his life in this world somehow if I hear him say he’s a Christian?
Taking my lesson from Bill Clinton — depends on what the definition of love is….I don’t know that a hug and the full expression love of God are synonymous – maybe more like second cousins or an ingredient in a recipe.
CS Lewis: The Problem of Pain/Divine Goodness: “When Christianity says that God loves man, it means that God loves man: not that He has some “disinterested”, because really indifferent, concern for our welfare, but that, in awful and surprising truth, we are the objects of his love. You asked for a loving God: you have one. The great spirit you so lightly invoked, the “lord of terrible aspect”, is present: not a senile benevolence that drowsily wishes you to be happy in your own way, nor the cold philanthropy of a conscientious magistrate, nor the care of a host who feels responsible for the comfort of his guests, but the consuming fire Himself, the Love that made the worlds, persistent as the artist’s love for his work and despotic as a man’s love for a dog, provident and venerable as a father’s love for a child, jealous, inexorable, exacting as love between the sexes.”
And what does that kind of love look like when I love someone for God?
Funny that your post is on love. Over the past couple of months God has completely redefined for me what it means and what it looks like to really love people. As I’ve opened my heart to Him He has opened my heart for the people I work with to the point that I literally ache for them at times. I was reading 1 Cor 13 the other day and read it in a fresh way. Loving people the way God loves is to love them relentlessly and unfailingly and extravagantly. As I allow God to open my heart to the people I work with, I see them coming closer to me because they are drawn to it. Don thanks for the post. It encouraged me tonight that I need to continue to open my heart to love the people around me.
Just an encouragement here to remember to love on the ‘demonic’ ones, too…
Thanks, Don.
On another note… a friend goes for an Amma hug every time she “comes to town”. She says that not only is the hug beautiful but the room full of people waiting and watching is resonating with love ( my friend definitely radiates love in her life). And she doesn’t just sit and hug but has worldwide charities about the world, including the US–some definite love in action. So it isn’t just about people seeking a hug from her, it is also about her capacity to love that big (and heck, she isn’t even a “christian”). Where do you suppose that love comes from? Something that has been on my mind lately and along came your post….
LOVE is a spiraling and undulating force spun through many colors, forms, and spheres of existence.
From greatly dispersed distances over an infinity of media, all of creation recognizes, recalls and longs for union with this singular blessed force.
Until “that which was lost, has been found”, those who wear the aura of this divine realm eminate guidance to those seeking renewal of essence and knowledge of the sacred path home.
I was recently thinking about what a gossip centric culture we have become. In a sense, gossip has become both our currency and our addiction. We use gossip to build ourselves up. To make ourselves feel justified, important or well-informed. But while the feeling of justification is brief, the bitterness we feel stays with us much longer. Love not only draws people to us. It draws us to ourselves. I have yet to find a person who gossips, and in turn is bitter, and yet can still love others and themselves genuinely. For example, it seems impossible that Amma is loving to others and returns home and says to a loved one, “Did you see the ways that one lady was dressed?!” My point is if we want to feel loved and affirmed we must start by loving and affirming others.
Thanks for your post Don!
It’s amazing how important affection and affirmation is in the life of everyone from a homeless person to a billion dollar wallstreet business man. We’re all desperate for love.
And I feel like I’m forced to beg the question, why aren’t “christians” living more loving lives (myself included)? Are most people in the church not really saved or are we so wrapped up in ourselves that we can’t let our walls down enough to show someone the love that saved us? … Thoughts to chew on…..
Hey Don,
I really like what you wrote. All of this love talk is spot on, and for me personally I have been drawn to churches (and their leadership) when love was so evident and have been repelled by others when love was lacking.
Just a question….. you wrote..”But the sad truth is people are not drawn to Amma because of her theological soundness, or her ability to give them right direction in life, or even to know their own purpose..”
Is this fact or opinion? If it i opinion, how did you draw upon that conclusion?
Thanks for the post!
Marci
This reminds me of The Beloved Prayer – a three-part guided meditation composed by Arthur LeClair for use in solitude. Meditating on God’s deep love for us and others can change us.
You may have noticed this wherever you are too, but here in Phoenix, the first Friday of each month there is an Art Walk downtown that has become very popular not just for artists and art lovers, but street vendors, musicians, and, unfortunately, proselytizing religions. It is a festive atmosphere that I quite enjoy participating in. It was in that atmosphere I first came across individuals carrying “Free Hugs” signs. From the first time I saw one, I lit up and thought – Wow! What a brilliant idea! From then on, I would redeem my free hug whenever it was offered. Being the curious person I am, I decided to find the root of this free hug movement. This is what I found: http://www.freehugscampaign.org/index.php?categoryid=1
I figured I’d share that since hugs are an important thing in this post. I once studied abroad and lived in a solitary studio apartment in a land where my native tongue was not spoken. To make a long story short, solitude and loneliness were constant companions so much so that they ultimately led to a mental breakdown, a hospitalization, and a premature flight back to the states. Interestingly, I was in France and the French don’t have a word for “hug” per say. Hugs are reserved primarily for family and intimate relationships. The closest word they have is “embracer” which could mean “to kiss” or “to embrace.” So you can imagine how few hugs I got that year.
Great reflection… the principle of loving others (or, as Huey Lewis says, the “power of love”)applies to youth groups, as well. In the group I work with, our main goal is to show students love and to pour life into them.
I hope it’s okay, but I quoted from this over in a post at the AIM Youth Workers’ resource – http://youthworkers.adventures.org/?filename=miraclegro-for-youth-groups-a-tip-from-the-beatles
Amen!
“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
I John 4:8
“Satan loves for us to speak the truth without love more than he wants us to speak lies.”
Amen! It’s sad for me to think back how many times I have done this. Thanks for the direct challenge.
Never heard of her but your account reminds me of another that I really enjoyed, Leo Busgalia. He was actually in the Guiness book of records for giving out the most hugs. He was a delightful, colorful and funny character that was enamored with life and had a fettish for leaves. He savored life. He used to say, “God’s gift to you is life. What you do with your life is your gift to God.” I was definitely drawn to him for the wonderful grace he displayed, and his lovely view on life. Like watching someone soak in a good painting or savor a glass of wine.
Anyway, as nice as it was I know that the God-life is entered in through Christ. No matter how lovely something sounds, if it is not Christ-centered, it is anti-Christ and at enmity with God. Our good can be the biggest hinderance to God’s good and best. That enemy disguising himself as an angel of light thing.
Thank God He sees our hearts, yes? Yes. I do believe if we are honestly seeking the truth and have the right heart about it, God can and does reveal himself to us, whether that be through a damascus road experience or burning bush, it’s up to God’s good judgement.
I wonder why we don’t hear much of the simplicity of the gospel message anymore. Think with all the side roads, detours, and mishaps it’s been hi-jacked. It’s still the most powerful and effective (John 3).
I believe it is coming back in proper Light-Jesus.
I just stopped back by to check out the ongoing comments and noticed that my comment left the day of the blog entry, which reflected on why people might find Jesus repellent, is no longer posted. It wasn’t a flaming comment, although it may have made some people uncomfortable and question their belief structures. I’m hoping it just got eaten by cyberspace and wasn’t removed because further debate and discussion were deemed unpalatable. Thanks for the writing and wisdom you share.
Deb,
I am not sure what happened. The only comments I don’t post are ones that are insulting or use profanity. Other than that, you should have been fine. I don’t remember deleting yours…
I had hoped it was just cyberspace chomping. Thanks for confirming. Not worth typing up again
[...] The Power of Love [...]
Don,
you’re a provocateur,
your words seem to stir up and provoke a reaction.
Sometimes, people react out of a religious spirit and some
react with the spirit of Jesus. Your comment “these people are demonic” was so interesting! Amazing how people can be shipwrecked by such ‘loaded’ words and fail to see the beautiful essence of the message.
I wonder if, tucked away in David’s psalm84, there is a similar truth. He declares “I would rather be a door keeper in the house of my God than to dwell in the tents of the wicked.” Perhaps we do dwell in the tents of the wicked when we comfortably accept a ‘church’ community which speaks a message contrary to the spirit of Jesus. Yeah, demonic. Satan just twiddles his thumbs at our ineffectiveness to REALLY love.
And as for Amma, wow….look at that one God made. She can provoke us towards love.
Your entry has me focused on those who speak Christian truths but fall short of really loving others. I am not against the use of demonic in the context you present. After all, Christ himself admonished Peter by saying “Get behind me Satan.” Surly Peter wasn’t demonic in a fully evil sense. What he said at the time simply furthered Satan’s mission running counter to the goal Jesus had set. I take it as a warning that among leaders there must be a constant vigilance. “Leader Love” is a bit harder to achieve as it must involve accepting criticism from those you lead. I think this willingness for one who is exalted to be willing to become humble is a manifestation of a loving heart. Perhaps we can use this as a measuring stick to decide who among our leaders has lost sight of what is true.
Mr Hugs himself.
A taste: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpZUc2f6Zk0&feature=related
I was introduced to him as a teen by my brother back in the 80‘s when he was featured on public television. He has beautiful things to share regarding our humanity and loving others as ourselves. Still some of the best stuff I have heard on the topic.
This is where I am at on the overall topic expressed: Walking out our humanity is a wonderful vehicle by which we learn to sympathize and empathize with our fellowman. A way God uses to help get us beyond the surface stuff that we make such a big deal about (the longer route out of Egypt). I may not agree with you on the surface details, and that’s ok, yet I have known joy and I have known sadness. I have also known love and I have also known hate. I have also danced and I have also cried. Know matter how you spell it, pronounce it, or where it is derived from, pain is pain. Furthermore, when I come face to face with myself apart from the grace of God, I find that I am the worst of all sinners and looking down my nose at you diminishes (oh, to grow in the understanding that it is truly by God’s grace that I am not totally without Light). Our humanity is the common ground we share and it nourishes human compassion, humility, and love.
But there is deeper to go still and this may sound crazy to some but I know there are others that know what I am talking about. I have also known, maybe more appropriate to say have had tastes, of God’s Love, Beauty and Peace. I know there is nothing like it and when I come to encounter it (most intimately by God manifesting and eminating it through me), I know as clearly as I know my name that IT ISN’T ME, it’s God revealing and expressing himself through me. I am a vessel filled with Him and his glory and I am getting a glorious taste of the manifestation of it. Human beings are not capable of replicating that. It is too “far-out”. How wonderous, magnificent, and the place I long to remain and never leave. I don’t claim to know all the reasons why things do and don’t take place yet I do feel that “in part” is a reminder what it is like to relate to my fellowman.
And this is how I feel God gives us the honor of partnering with Him in sweeping humanity up to his throne, Jesus continuing his Priestly role as Son of God, Son of man…in us. What we as humans need to be cautious of is sympathizing and empathizing more with man, than with God. He has been betrayed by us all…He needs to be first. God forbid we build a tower of Babel.
We can touch humanity but if we don’t give them Jesus, they miss the most beautiful, intimate encounter with God. We can draw men to men and the soul can find some benefit, but to have missed the Fountain of Living Waters…what a loss. To have missed an encounter with Jesus…God help us not to miss Him, Christ in me the hope of glory.
Anyway, know it was long but wanted to share that and Leo who was a benefit to me. I don’t have to totally agree with every word someone shares to see the benefit in it and with Jesus as my Light, find where and how it fits in Him. That’s it.
[...] Finishing Well“Without obstacles, nothing grows.” Blaine Hogan on The Gift of ObstaclesThe Power of Love“What most Christians can’t do is have transparent, authentic relationships with [...]
Satan loves giving hugs too, and especially loves caressing people’s emotions. The truth given in love is painful sometimes and makes us, who are in sin and unwilling to repent of it, feel like hell, and that’s exactly what Satan uses to thwart the Holy Spirit’s conviction, and deceives people into thinking that God and His people are unloving. Stick to loving people in God’s truth and mercy, not for our (or theirs for that matter,) own emotional gratification.
he also loves making people feel ashamed and guilty.
Hmmmm, so if the truth is “given in love” and the person “feels like hell”, what was the point? During my militant non-believer years, those “truths” spoken to me just fueled my hate for christians (not proud of this…) Later i met a new friend who modeled how best to use love to model HIS love. I was initially horrified to learn that she was a Christian (and a prayer warrior), but the love she expressed in her life (never judged or pointed out my sins — ‘though there were many opportunities…) quickly softened my heart to allow Him to start a major Spiritual excavation. Just wonder if it is easier for us to “speak the truth in love” rather than to truly love? I know i struggle with it.
“Define the antagonists to your mission as the forces that rip apart your love, even if those forces are Christians who speak the truth, but do not love their neighbors or their enemies. These people are demonic.”
With all due respect Mr. Miller, I believe statements like these are exactly why Postmodern and Emergent Christians are sometimes not seen in the best light by other Christians. I realize that I am a bit late in commenting here. That, and I’m not sure if you’ll be personally reading this message or not, but I feel I should at least tell you this, if nothing else than to at least convey some of the feelings Christians may have towards the postmodern movement within Christianity.
One central theme of your post is that love is exactly what Christians should have for others and I’m not denying that in any way. Another of your central messages is that we shouldn’t judge others, in addition to showing them our love. But yet you statements show exactly the kind of judgment in action that you say other Christians shouldn’t take part in. Your central message is that we should love one another and not judge each other. But you are doing the exact opposite by judging other Christians as being “demonic.”
You say we shouldn’t judge Hindus, Muslims, and Buddhists because it would be unfair, judgmental, and even “Demonic” of us. But yet, judging other Christians as being “Demonic” or “Un-true” in turn is perfectly alright?
[...] The Power of Love [...]
[...] The Power of Love [...]
[...] http://donmilleris.com/2010/06/28/they-will-know-us-by-our-love/ [...]