I confess I read this book because of all the hoopla on the internet. John Piper hates it, Mark Driscoll wants to say how much he hates it but is tired of launching his enemies onto the New York Times bestsellers list so he talks about it without talking about it. People everywhere are talking about it.
Man, I’m a sucker for controversy so I placed my order. Surprisingly, the book has been out of print for a while and I could only get this used, battered copy, and it cost me more than the sale price from twenty years ago. Two words: WORTH IT!
Love Wins is a romance novel by Barbara Cartland (who knew John Piper read this stuff? So few men talk about it even though we ALL read them ALL the time! John Piper and I are SO BESTIES NOW!)
Love Wins: Caught in a fierce love triangle, Joan June is torn between her dentist and her chiropractor. The dentist has more money, obviously, but is less open to the spiritual ideas and natural practices of the chiropractor. One gives her security and the other pops her back for free and introduces her to the ancient practice of smelling plants and rubbing oils and bird poo on her face. And whale music. What ever shall she do?
Thinking she’s made her choice, and on her way to tell the Chiropractor he’s the one, June doubles over on the street with a severe tooth ache? Is it a sign? You’ll have to read the book to find out that, in fact, she chooses the dentist! And the chiropractor turns out to be two-timing her anyway. Occasionally she looks back on a life that could have been, but each time she thanks God in heaven for the good man she’s found, even if in moments of temptation she spreads a little dried bird poo on her cheeks to keep her looking young.
Man this book was good. With all due respect, John Piper has no idea what he’s talking about. Read it. Love it. Feel it. Live it. Thank you Barbara Cartland.
I can’t believe you gave away the ending like that! I can see why it is such a controversial book, what with all the alternative medicine involved in chiropracty.
I don’t know if this is a facetious blog or not, but the controversial “Love Wins” book is by pastor Rob Bell, not Barbara Cartland. If this blog is a joke, I would still be interested to read your review of the other “Love Wins!”
Yes it’s a joke.
Jacquelyn,
I don’t know if yours was a facetious comment or not. If not, uh….
Hahahahahhahaha…haha….ha?
Oh, Jacquelyn
I wonder; does anyone really appreciate the holistic approach to spiritual maturity and dental and mental health?
This is incredible. Thank you making me laugh. I needed that today
Man I love it. Made me laugh out loud. And yes I still believe Love Wins. Thanks for a fresh perspective.
[...] Donald Miller [...]
i think you guys will enjoy this. a great remake of the video that sparked the entire controversy. its called “Jesus Wins.” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDLCN8GwBHE
“Good-Bye Barbara Cartland”
lol
Thank you Donald! That made me laugh so hard! I really needed a good laugh today… Bet God laughed as well…
Ah, you make me smile
Thank you!
I’m confused. Did they have dentists and chiropractors in Regency times? Or is the front cover about an incident when the hero and heroine were dressing up like Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett? Or did the hero just enjoy wearing ruffled shirts and top boots?
OMG. I laughed so hard. So freakin hard.
[...] Read the whole review. [...]
you are silly.
good idea to stay out of the controversy…
[...] exceptional and riveting Book Review by Donald Miller. Ok, maybe it’s just [...]
You, my brother…made me smile hugely. That was cool. Excellent take on the book, and so glad you’re secure enough to admit your taste in great literature:-) LOL!!
I love you, Donald Miller!
[...] Beginning when Justin Taylor wrote a blog post claiming Bell might be a universalist, it seems everyone has been seeking any opportunity to offer their viewpoints. To date, my favorite review of this book has to be Donald Miller’s concise, and very honest take on it. You can read it here. [...]
Spoiler alert. I wanted to see if love really won at the end or if it was triangle with only losers and heartbreak.
Some people are like Joan June, optimists who want love to win. Others cannot open their hearts to the possibilities of being hurt and therefore go for the shadow of love. Either way, it is only in giving ourselves to love that we can understand what it is about. Only then we can only hope for more than bird poo at the end.
So thankful for this honest, balanced review. I feel much better just know there are people like you out there who are not caught up in the fierce battle between the saints who believe it’s ok to read trite romances and those who believe it is not.
Ah. I had always wondered just what John Piper was hiding. Now I know it’s a predilection for romance novels. I wonder what other things are hidden on his shelf…
Nice. Ironic. Very Portland of You.
Now for $249, could you give us a real review/opinion of Rob Bell’s book? Or will you only give us the meaning of life? Oh wait…that’s too propositional, isn’t it?!? (More money, perhaps???)
Evasiveness is SOOO postmodern.
Peace and Love, Inc.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iy3FOr9TF-c&feature=player_embedded
I laughed so hard, I cried. A riveting review. That was the best April 1 post I’ve seen. Well done!
If good writing inspires others to write than I am willing to begin reviewing controversial books regularly. Thanks Don. Poignant review of Love Wins. Barbara Cartland really confronts orthodoxy in a responsible way, and your affirmation of this is appreciated.
Thank u for giving me a laugh — I like your take on the whole thing! You are a funny dude full of surprises!
[...] thoughts on this blog. My favorite post in the last six months has been Don Miller’s Review of Love Wins. This confirmed the fact, that I would love to be a writer like Don [...]
still laughing–and trying not to laugh at the commenters esp. #1—laughing so hard my kids want to know what’s so funny and I can’t explain
Pure genius.
Thanks Don! Really appreciated this!
You are hilarious.
[...] thoughts on this blog. My favorite post in the last six months has been Don Miller’s Review of Love Wins. This confirmed the fact, that I would love to be a writer like Don [...]
Aw man you crack me up!
Way to spoil the ending, Don!
Funny….hmmm. No. I love Donald Millers books…but the issue of hell has eternal consequences. A book written by another popular pastor who says “cool there is no hell”. Except, the Bible says there is. Jesus said there was. He died to save us from it, right? so…cant say this is funny……
Hilarious dude!
[...] about a little book called Love Wins. The best reviews of Love Wins that I’ve seen come from Donald Miller of Blue Like Jazz fame and Margaret [...]
Ok, there is a major glaring oversight here. The book mentioned in the first Paragraph that has controversy hanging over it is Love Wins by Rob Bell not the Novel by Barbara Cartland. You might want to make sure you get the right book before you try this again. Just search amazon for Rob Bell it will probably be the first book that pops up and it’s still in print because it only came out March 2011.
Are you serious? I think this was a joke…one of the best ones that I’ve seen over this whole overblown Rob Bell situation!
I’ve been reading free out of print books on my Kindle lately, so that really set me up and I sort of believed you with a little puzzlement until I read the comments and looked up the book on Amazon. Maybe being Episcopalian also kept me out of the controversy. Most Episcopal priests don’t have enough time to stray from the text since their sermons are so short.
Speaking of old out of print books; have you ever read Orthodoxy by Chesterton?
Very smooth, Don. Also funny, witty, refreshing, and all that…
But also a bit CS, since you know some of these folks were looking to you as a cooler head on a subject they care deeply about because of real people they have loved and lost. Why not just send them to Edward Fudge if you don’t want to get labeled?
[...] Read Don Miller’s review (you’ll get a good laugh): http://donmilleris.com/2011/04/01/my-review-of-love-wins/ [...]
[...] Don Miller’s must read review of ‘Love Wins’ [...]
nice post .. thanks for this review ..
Ok. I don’t normally write LOL because it’s not true, but this post is so LOL! I loved it. Thanks!!
Too funny.
I guess I’ve been wrong to criticize Love Wins. It seems I read the wrong book! I read a book about why some random preacher thinks we should ditch 2000 years of Biblical scholarship because he doesn’t like the idea of hell. It was poorly written, like a junior high student experimenting with different writing styles to show how edgy he was. This book sounds much better. Who doesn’t love a love triangle involving dentists and chiropractors? Can’t wait to find the real Love Wins.
My wife says anyone can tell by looking at the cover that that man is neither a chiropractor nor a dentist. And, what woman in her right mind would choose having her teeth cleaned over a good back rub? In my experience, for love to win it usually begins with the latter. And I think that is universal.
[...] can find it here [...]
[...] was a romance novel written by Barbara Cartland and published in 1981. (You can read what he had to say here). Satire aside, I think he was making it pretty clear that Bell’s Love Wins was not quite the [...]
[...] Now for an example of a proper way to share your opinion, taken from the scenario with Rob Bell’s Love Wins. Donald Miller Won here, since his opinion is stated both creatively and timely. It came out a little bit after everyone was exploding about it, but not in the style of Jon Acuff’s two week late response. http://donmilleris.com/2011/04/01/my-review-of-love-wins/ [...]
Thank you for this….gives perspective. I laughed out loud. Thank you.